HA! What a question! Do you have stress? Don't we all? But the important question is how do you deal with it?
I have realized something lately....we all try to deal with it ourselves! Why do we do that to ourselves? That actually just piles on MORE stress! But realistically, why do we do that? I know for me I try to deal with it myself for a variety of reasons. I don't want to bother my family or friends. I know everyone else has enough junk to deal with and I don't want to bother them, add to their stress or a variety of other things. I sometimes feel like it is a weakness to admit I need help. I sometimes am embarrassed that I can't deal with it as well as I feel I should. Or think I am stressed over things that don't stress other people.
Anyone else ever feel like that?
Well, I was thinking about it today and I remembered...yeah, I know, a bit late, that I don't HAVE to deal with stress alone! For starters, I have God. An amazing and wonderfully loving God who WANTS me to come to him with my stress! And even if I don't go to him, he knows anyway. It isn't like with a friend that I can try to not bother them and they are clueless.
So as I sit here today, trying NOT to focus on all the millions of things I need to get done, or how stressful the evening running around will be, I am resting in him. I am relaxing and knowing that he will be with me today no matter what I go through. He knows all the things I forget and how important they are. He knows how I try to keep organized (and fail!). He knows what works for me and what frustrates me. He also helps me remember and try new things to see what works for me. I have to CHOOSE, DAILY, to trust that he is with me no matter what. That doesn't make the stress go away, it just makes it easier!
So, how can I deal with stress, since it DOES exist and I can't avoid it? First, I am going to acknowledge it. I am stressed. Partially because of things I can control and partially because of things I can't control. Identifying what you CAN control is next. If you are in charge of it and it stresses you, figure out how to change that! For me, I am an avoider. If I know something is going to stress me or be difficult, I avoid it. Then I stress and worry because it isn't done. DUH! If I would just do it and get it over with, then yes, I would have some stress, but then it would be done! We did that with our taxes this year. Usually we have them done in early February but this year with our exchange student we weren't really sure how to do them so we just kept putting them off. Yep, right up until Sunday. Then it turned out they were pretty easy and we cheated ourselves out of our return for quite a long time! Sounds silly, but we did it!
After I change the things that I CAN change and acknowledged that I can't change some things, I have to change my attitude. I spend a lot of time frustrated by the things I can't change. Like that does any good, right? So instead, when there are things beyond my control I am working on REGULARLY and CONSISTENTLY giving them to God. Simply acknowledging that he is in control of the situation and he sees the big picture is pretty comforting. Some people will rely on a Bible verse or a phrase that calms or comforts them. It doesn't happen overnight.
The last thing I am really working on is to STOP! Stop worrying, stop fretting and mostly stop dwelling on the negatives. This became clear to me last week when I had a really busy week and I was REALLY looking forward to my Friday home...all day....just me and James....working on business stuff....blogging....hanging out....catching up on chores.....etc. Hmmm....was that God's plan? Apparently not. I had a friend who had her dad die that morning. So I grabbed some food and headed to her house. I felt really silly because I took a laundry basket (yes, really) full of "stuff" and it is a friend that even though we get along, we don't spend that much time together so I wasn't entire confident that she "needed" me. So I packed up my food and my makings for chai and I headed over there. I parked myself in her kitchen, made chai, started a meal in the crock pot and basically hung out and listened to her talk. I let my little man play with her children and distract them. I stressed that I wasn't doing enough and yada yada yada. Then God knocked on my heart and told me it wasn't about ME...it was about HER. I was filling a need. Even if I didn't feel useful. And all of the sudden, my stress left. I wasn't worried about what I WASN'T doing. I was just enjoying strengthening a friendship. I was not worrying about all the "Stuff" and I was worrying about my friend. Yes, it was a really long day. No, I didn't get anything done that I had planned, but I followed God's plan and I felt no stress about what I didn't get done. It was still all waiting for me on Saturday!
So today is another day when I could stress, lots to do, unsure of the exact schedule, a long list of things to do, etc. And yet, I am at peace. God is in control and I am allowing that. And just since I started typing this, one of the things that I was regretting saying yes to because it was causing me a scheduling conflict and some stress got cancelled. See, calm down, focus on God and give him the stress. He is so much better at dealing with it than I am! I think I will head out to finish my day calmer and less stressed, more focused on him today!
How will you handle your stress today? Alone or with Him?
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Balancing Act
As I try to figure it out, more and more things get piled on and I am always struggling to figure it out! Unfortunately my teeter totter is not as simple as the one pictured above. I have my family, my new home based business, my church commitments, my youth group mentoring and then in there somewhere I like to do a few things for me! How do you prioritize your time? Do you have a list of things that are all important? How do you balance them?
I am still trying to figure this out on a regular basis but I have come to some conclusions lately.
First is God. ALWAYS God is first. When I start my day with Bible study and prayer, my day just goes better. I KNOW this. I have experienced this regularly. Of course, I also regularly forget it. I get "BUSY" and it slips my mind. I have the world's best intentions but follow through is sporadic. Then I get discouraged!
Second is family. This gets more complicated. It shouldn't but when you have a larger family (I have 4 children and 1 exchange student until June), it is just hard to keep up with EVERYONE the same. I WANT to devote equal amounts of quality time to each person but then I also see that each one needs me differently at different times so I can't schedule this to fit MY needs. I need to fit THEIR needs. That makes is so much more complicated! I still haven't quite figured out how to balance the needs of my 3 year old with the needs of my 14 year old! I have discovered though, that QUALITY time is different in each of their eyes. For my 3 year old, it is cuddle time. Or playing with trains! For my 7 year old, she just wants me to take her with me. Just her. No one else. If I go to the store and I take her, it makes her happy. For my 12 year old...UGH...your guess is as good as mine! It varies so much from day to day, week to week that I can't keep up with her! My 14 year old wants quiet, contemplative time. She wants to work with me while no one else is around so we can talk and if that time is NOT available (even if she chooses not to use it!) then she gets grumpy and conflict happens. That is when her worst attitude comes out.
Then I have my good intentions...my business that is to help me be able to stay home with my children and devote more time to them. It takes part of my time, but still less time than a full time, out of the house job would. I can be flexible and work around their schedules so that I have to spend part of the time away from them, but I can do it at the best times for them.
My time with the church and with youth group is not as flexible. There are scheduled events. But I have chosen to get involved in ways that I am either with my children or busy at the same times they are busy so that I am not stealing too much of their time.
The part that really bothers me is the taxi service. It seems like the kids (who have very limited activities) are in things at different times! I spend much more time running from place to place than I want to. I am sure that will get better as it is easier to leave the littler ones with older ones.
As I stop to think about my life, I am thrilled. I love it. I knew when I was a child that being a Mom was a very important thing to me. I now find that it is the most rewarding thing! I have a wonderful husband who supports me in staying home and devoting time to being a Mom and that adds to it. I don't know how people work full time and still are Wife, Mom, Housekeeper and any other title you can think of! It would exhaust me!
So today as I balance my schedule....and learn to say NO to a few things (which isn't too easy!), I encourage you to prioritize and learn to say NO to a few things! Focus on the best things in your life and know that your family will appreciate it!
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Re-evaluating your home church
Sounds kinda strange doesn't it? Re-evaluating your home church? When was the last time you did that? Have you ever?
Think back...how long have you been in your current church? 1 year, 2 years, 5 years, 10 years or more? Now think about this...how much have you, and your family, changed in that amount of time? A little, a lot, so much that people couldn't recognize you on the street if they knew you then?
As I look back at the churches I have attended in my life as a believer, I see similarities...and extreme differences! I chose my first church because I was at college and I had friends who said "Hey, this church has a great college class, really active and lots of fun". Yep, it might sound shallow but that is how it was chosen. Combine that with the fact that the church ran a free shuttle bus to the college campus to get me and I didn't have to beg a ride each week. Hey, I was a college kid with no vehicle...what do you expect! HOWEVER....if that was all the church offered, I wouldn't have lasted long! As it was, I learned that the Bible was not just something historical...but applicable to my daily life! A lesson I treasure to this day!
My next major church change...my husband and I chose a church that was close to our house. Yep, we were in a larger city than either of us had ever been in and we found a small church close to us. It was all about location. And we muddled through. We liked a lot of the people but really didn't get fed much there. The sermons were not impactful, there was not much in the way of bible study available, etc. We kind of just hung out there while trying to decide what to do. Then we found out the church had hired a known child molester to drive the van for the church daycare and we decided that was it for us! We really didn't want anything to do with a church willing to compromise children. While we were totally not against giving second chances to people, that went a bit far on the foolish and downright dangerous side!
Next came a church farther away....we went there for 6 months. The first day we were there we were greeted....in the next 6 months we were never greeted, never invited to Sunday school, never connected at all. We skipped an entire month of church and when we got back someone came up and said "It was so nice to see you guys last week." but we hadn't been there the week before. We hadn't been missed and it wasn't noticed if we were there. So guess what....we left!
I was at each of those churches for about a year. Then we found a home church. It was a large church....and I mean large! We went to the church the first week and I loved it! Of course, I was pumped and getting so much out of the sermon and I looked over and my darling hubby who took notes every single week was not writing a thing! Ack! Oh no! What now! Were we going to clash? Nope...this is when I learned that he took notes to help him stay focused on boring sermons but that sermon was enough to capture his attention and keep it! We had found our home! We were there a long time. Through the birth of our two daughters, through his illness and eventual death. We loved the Saturday night service that was smaller than the Sunday morning ones. We connected. We made friends. We got involved. But, after I got remarried and we were moving away, it wasn't realistic to stay there. Change needed to come.
We moved to our current church. Once again we chose because of seemingly little things...it was close to the house, we knew at least one couple who went there and it had a band. Yep. It had a band. Those were the draws! Over the last 10 years we have changed our family dynamic from Mom, Dad and two little girls to now having Mom, Dad, teenager, tween, little girl and preschool boy! WOW! What a change! And in that time I have tried various things in the church, bible study, Sunday school, hanging out with other ladies while the kids were at Awana, ladies' night outs, etc. The kids loved it. They have a great program for young children. They learn a ton. They have wonderful people there who genuinely love the kids. But I wasn't connected. We stayed there for the kids. As time passed I got involved with the youth group. I found a spot I fit! I still felt the lack of connections in the friendship area but I felt like God had a plan for me with the youth. This past year has been hard. I know I am drawn to working with the teens, but the kids were floundering. There were changes happening in the youth Sunday school that the kids didn't like. The youngest girl was just not enjoying Awana. We were getting GREAT sermons but not even getting to say "hi" to people in church. We would walk in, go to service and walk out. No connections. People would refer to my home church and I wanted to say...not a home...just a place we go to listen to great sermons with no connections to people! Then came more changes...the youth group is changing....and for reasons I won't get into, I am given a strong impression that I am not welcome or wanted to be working with the teens this fall. As all of this is happening, a friend is talking about a new church they are starting and I keep thinking...WOW! That sounds like a church I would love...but I don't want to move my kids, rock the boat, make a change, etc. More things happen....and I start to realize....maybe God is talking and I am stuck in my church rut, ignoring Him.
So along comes some serious prayer time! And I realized! A church that fits you (speaking generically here, not about any church in particular) when you are a young couple which children who are 2, 3 or 4 and the church has a fabulous children's program might NOT be such a great fit when your children are 12, 13 or 14 if they don't have an equally amazing teenage/youth program. Yet we stay. We are COMFORTABLE where we are...but are we getting the MOST out of church? My family dynamic has changed a LOT in the last 10 years. If I were to look NOW for a church, we would not look for the same things we looked for 10 years ago. Oh yes, there are still benefits at our church. It is still the same distance from our home, they still have a band, we still get fabulous, thought provoking sermons....yet we are still disconnected, our children don't feel like they are getting anything from Sunday school, we are left searching for more.
After all this time I have become convinced that maybe God is leading us in another direction. Maybe HE has a greater plan and I am missing it because I am nervous, even scared, to go to a new church where I might not know anyone! I don't wanna leave my comfort zone! Maybe I am wrong! Maybe I am misinterpreting things! Maybe I am right where God wants me and the restless and lack of peace I feel is satan and not God prompting me to stretch? Gee, how easy it would be to talk myself into staying right there in the same old rut I have been in! Does that mean my current church is a bad church? NO! Absolutely not! But even a great church might not be where God wants me and that means I am missing out on His plan in my life!
Wow! Where did this all come from? What does it mean? It means that after some really serious prayer time, my family is church hunting! It doesn't mean we hate our church, the people in it, or that there was anything horrible that happened to make us leave...it simply means that over time the call we feel from God is AWAY from our current church and TOWARD something else. We aren't sure where He is leading, but we do know we need to follow and if we don't we will miss out.
Will I miss my church, where my children are comfortable and I know the sermons will lead me toward God? Yes. Am I eagerly anticipating what He has in store for us? YES! And that is the key. I want to make sure I am listening and following Him rather than staying in my comfortable rut and missing out!
How about you? Care to re-evaluate with me? Maybe your answer will be that you are exactly where God wants you! How cool would that be!? Maybe you will find that like us, He is calling you to try out something new? Are you willing to try?
I am stepping out in faith (and lots of trepidation) and trusting that something amazing is happening in our family!
Think back...how long have you been in your current church? 1 year, 2 years, 5 years, 10 years or more? Now think about this...how much have you, and your family, changed in that amount of time? A little, a lot, so much that people couldn't recognize you on the street if they knew you then?
As I look back at the churches I have attended in my life as a believer, I see similarities...and extreme differences! I chose my first church because I was at college and I had friends who said "Hey, this church has a great college class, really active and lots of fun". Yep, it might sound shallow but that is how it was chosen. Combine that with the fact that the church ran a free shuttle bus to the college campus to get me and I didn't have to beg a ride each week. Hey, I was a college kid with no vehicle...what do you expect! HOWEVER....if that was all the church offered, I wouldn't have lasted long! As it was, I learned that the Bible was not just something historical...but applicable to my daily life! A lesson I treasure to this day!
My next major church change...my husband and I chose a church that was close to our house. Yep, we were in a larger city than either of us had ever been in and we found a small church close to us. It was all about location. And we muddled through. We liked a lot of the people but really didn't get fed much there. The sermons were not impactful, there was not much in the way of bible study available, etc. We kind of just hung out there while trying to decide what to do. Then we found out the church had hired a known child molester to drive the van for the church daycare and we decided that was it for us! We really didn't want anything to do with a church willing to compromise children. While we were totally not against giving second chances to people, that went a bit far on the foolish and downright dangerous side!
Next came a church farther away....we went there for 6 months. The first day we were there we were greeted....in the next 6 months we were never greeted, never invited to Sunday school, never connected at all. We skipped an entire month of church and when we got back someone came up and said "It was so nice to see you guys last week." but we hadn't been there the week before. We hadn't been missed and it wasn't noticed if we were there. So guess what....we left!
I was at each of those churches for about a year. Then we found a home church. It was a large church....and I mean large! We went to the church the first week and I loved it! Of course, I was pumped and getting so much out of the sermon and I looked over and my darling hubby who took notes every single week was not writing a thing! Ack! Oh no! What now! Were we going to clash? Nope...this is when I learned that he took notes to help him stay focused on boring sermons but that sermon was enough to capture his attention and keep it! We had found our home! We were there a long time. Through the birth of our two daughters, through his illness and eventual death. We loved the Saturday night service that was smaller than the Sunday morning ones. We connected. We made friends. We got involved. But, after I got remarried and we were moving away, it wasn't realistic to stay there. Change needed to come.
We moved to our current church. Once again we chose because of seemingly little things...it was close to the house, we knew at least one couple who went there and it had a band. Yep. It had a band. Those were the draws! Over the last 10 years we have changed our family dynamic from Mom, Dad and two little girls to now having Mom, Dad, teenager, tween, little girl and preschool boy! WOW! What a change! And in that time I have tried various things in the church, bible study, Sunday school, hanging out with other ladies while the kids were at Awana, ladies' night outs, etc. The kids loved it. They have a great program for young children. They learn a ton. They have wonderful people there who genuinely love the kids. But I wasn't connected. We stayed there for the kids. As time passed I got involved with the youth group. I found a spot I fit! I still felt the lack of connections in the friendship area but I felt like God had a plan for me with the youth. This past year has been hard. I know I am drawn to working with the teens, but the kids were floundering. There were changes happening in the youth Sunday school that the kids didn't like. The youngest girl was just not enjoying Awana. We were getting GREAT sermons but not even getting to say "hi" to people in church. We would walk in, go to service and walk out. No connections. People would refer to my home church and I wanted to say...not a home...just a place we go to listen to great sermons with no connections to people! Then came more changes...the youth group is changing....and for reasons I won't get into, I am given a strong impression that I am not welcome or wanted to be working with the teens this fall. As all of this is happening, a friend is talking about a new church they are starting and I keep thinking...WOW! That sounds like a church I would love...but I don't want to move my kids, rock the boat, make a change, etc. More things happen....and I start to realize....maybe God is talking and I am stuck in my church rut, ignoring Him.
So along comes some serious prayer time! And I realized! A church that fits you (speaking generically here, not about any church in particular) when you are a young couple which children who are 2, 3 or 4 and the church has a fabulous children's program might NOT be such a great fit when your children are 12, 13 or 14 if they don't have an equally amazing teenage/youth program. Yet we stay. We are COMFORTABLE where we are...but are we getting the MOST out of church? My family dynamic has changed a LOT in the last 10 years. If I were to look NOW for a church, we would not look for the same things we looked for 10 years ago. Oh yes, there are still benefits at our church. It is still the same distance from our home, they still have a band, we still get fabulous, thought provoking sermons....yet we are still disconnected, our children don't feel like they are getting anything from Sunday school, we are left searching for more.
After all this time I have become convinced that maybe God is leading us in another direction. Maybe HE has a greater plan and I am missing it because I am nervous, even scared, to go to a new church where I might not know anyone! I don't wanna leave my comfort zone! Maybe I am wrong! Maybe I am misinterpreting things! Maybe I am right where God wants me and the restless and lack of peace I feel is satan and not God prompting me to stretch? Gee, how easy it would be to talk myself into staying right there in the same old rut I have been in! Does that mean my current church is a bad church? NO! Absolutely not! But even a great church might not be where God wants me and that means I am missing out on His plan in my life!
Wow! Where did this all come from? What does it mean? It means that after some really serious prayer time, my family is church hunting! It doesn't mean we hate our church, the people in it, or that there was anything horrible that happened to make us leave...it simply means that over time the call we feel from God is AWAY from our current church and TOWARD something else. We aren't sure where He is leading, but we do know we need to follow and if we don't we will miss out.
Will I miss my church, where my children are comfortable and I know the sermons will lead me toward God? Yes. Am I eagerly anticipating what He has in store for us? YES! And that is the key. I want to make sure I am listening and following Him rather than staying in my comfortable rut and missing out!
How about you? Care to re-evaluate with me? Maybe your answer will be that you are exactly where God wants you! How cool would that be!? Maybe you will find that like us, He is calling you to try out something new? Are you willing to try?
I am stepping out in faith (and lots of trepidation) and trusting that something amazing is happening in our family!
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Master Bedroom
How many of you have the master bedroom as your personal sanctuary? Your special place for you and your hubby? How many have your kids in and out of it all day and all night? Is it clean or is it the catch all room?
In our house it is a combo. While are children are not forbidden to be in our room, it is also not a regular place for them. They can, and often do, drop things off in there but it is essentially OUR space. They do not share our bed or come to our room regularly. The occasional thunderstorm or nightmare will drive a younger child to the floor beside our bed. Usually sickness ends with Mommy in the living room with the child. That being said...our room is also that catch all! It is the place where everything gets thrown! Company pulling in the driveway? Hurry, run this basket of clean laundry to Mom's room and shut the door! Don't know what to do with something? Drop it in Mom's room and let her deal with it. And MOST of the time it gets tossed on my bed. Well, come 10 pm when I am trying to go to bed I am NOT in the mood to fold, sort or otherwise deal with STUFF...so it gets moved to the floor to be dealt with later. There is the catch....when is later? For me, it never seems to come! Here are the before pictures. I will be honest...this is the worst it has ever been!
As you can see, there was stuff kind of piled everywhere. Some from Christmas. Some from loaning the breathing machine but not the medicine to an Amish friend. Some that needs stored. Some that is too small for my kids and needs donated but I had to sort it first. Everything gets tossed in here!
Well, yesterday morning...when these pictures were taken...I had been at the end of my rope! I was at my ultimate limit! And the kids had stepped up on Monday and had the first floor in good shape so instead of dedicating my time to my public areas, I got to attack my personal, private HEAP!
Do I want it to get this bad? No! Do I usually let it? No. Does it get so overwhelming that I don't know where to start? Oh yeah!
So I started at the doorway and worked across the room. I sorted, I removed from the room. There was very little trash...it was all stuff that hasn't been put away (like laundry tossed on the cedar chest) and Christmas gifts and such. So I worked, and I worked and I worked. And then I had to leave! It wasn't done! I knew it would be hard to come back and I didn't want to leave it half done...but I had to!
Before I got to the room again, a friend posted on her facebook about rearranging furniture. She asked if we tend to periodically rearrange or leave everything as is. I am a rearranger. I LOVE to rearrange when the kids and Cory are not home and then watch their faces when they walk in! Too funny! So of course, I decided to finish the room last night and rearrange while I was at it!
There are still areas that need help like the top of this wire cage drawer for Cory's jeans. And you might be able to see that the rug needs vacuumed...but since I really don't OWN one....I have to borrow from my mother-in-law! This also has shelves on top that are waiting for my hubby to have time to install them on either side of the fireplace. They have been sitting there since I got them for him for Christmas....at least 4 years ago! Should I hold my breath that they will get up this year? Maybe! The two doors lead to the bathroom and the bedroom walk-in closet which were not yet TOUCHED so the doors got closed so you couldn't see them!
I also still need to tackle my bookshelf. If you can see, it is all at least 2 books deep and much of it is 3 layers deep. And this is just ONE bookshelf in the house! There is another in the hallway, one in Rebekah's room, at least two in the basement and still books in boxes! This picture also shows the wire basket unit that holds my jeans and shorts. Since I have family who sent me lots of pretty things from Kenya, I used some of them to drape over the sides of the baskets to pretty them up a bit!
As I continue to go around the room, I am reminded how much love my hubby put into this room as he carefully laid the wood floor and put the beautiful patterns in it. You can see the lighter stripes in these pictures but as I get over the fire place you can truly see his craftsmanship as you look under the wood rack and see the intricate square he created. It took him a long time to get it just right and it was all because he wanted our room to feel special. Then it struck me. Keeping my house clean is something I have tried to do to make it welcoming so I could feel free to invite people and share my God with them. But my room gets put last. What does that tell my hubby? Am I unintentionally telling him that he isn't as important to me as a million other things? Am I giving him the impression that I don't love him enough to put forth the effort? Oh, ouch! That kinda hurts! And yet....it gives me pause. And it gives me motivation! I want to finish the room and have it look AMAZING instead of just tidy up a bit! I want to blow him away! Oh, realistically I still see areas that need work and have no idea when I will get back up there to work on them, but I can say he was in shock when he got up there last night. He joked about being in the wrong house! And he slept peacefully in front of the fire in this clean room, having been SHOWN he was important.
As you can see, the mantle still needs some work...and I realized yesterday that only 2 of our 4 children have their picture up! Oops! Guess I need to add a few frames! The wood rack is empty since he made a fire last night and the one downstairs is full so I think I will take some up and get it ready for another fire! That was nice! Falling asleep to the crackling fire! My curio cabinet of music boxes got moved, but not dusted and cleaned out well. I admit it. It is not a perfect job! But I think the amazing thing is that I did it! I cleaned up the room, I moved the curio cabinet, the bed and the cedar chest and the end result was that Cory wanted to know WHY and I was able to say "Because I love you".
And you know the side benefit? Some giggles! See, moving the bed all around messed with him! He gets up earlier than me in the morning and he is so wonderful he makes his way to the bathroom in the dark. He has done it from one spot in the room for a year or two now. So this morning he floundered. He fumbled! He almost fell! It appears he does better maneuvering through a maze of stuff than across open floor space! Oops! Sorry dear! But you will get used to it because I realized! My master bedroom IS my sanctuary! And it is evidence of my love for my husband and he is NOT going to come last on the list anymore!
Thank you for sharing this walk through my honestly horrible room! Next on my list will be the bathroom and the closet....but I admit...not today! We are painting the living room, staircase and part of the kitchen this weekend and I am resting up to tackle that!
In our house it is a combo. While are children are not forbidden to be in our room, it is also not a regular place for them. They can, and often do, drop things off in there but it is essentially OUR space. They do not share our bed or come to our room regularly. The occasional thunderstorm or nightmare will drive a younger child to the floor beside our bed. Usually sickness ends with Mommy in the living room with the child. That being said...our room is also that catch all! It is the place where everything gets thrown! Company pulling in the driveway? Hurry, run this basket of clean laundry to Mom's room and shut the door! Don't know what to do with something? Drop it in Mom's room and let her deal with it. And MOST of the time it gets tossed on my bed. Well, come 10 pm when I am trying to go to bed I am NOT in the mood to fold, sort or otherwise deal with STUFF...so it gets moved to the floor to be dealt with later. There is the catch....when is later? For me, it never seems to come! Here are the before pictures. I will be honest...this is the worst it has ever been!
As you can see, there was stuff kind of piled everywhere. Some from Christmas. Some from loaning the breathing machine but not the medicine to an Amish friend. Some that needs stored. Some that is too small for my kids and needs donated but I had to sort it first. Everything gets tossed in here!Well, yesterday morning...when these pictures were taken...I had been at the end of my rope! I was at my ultimate limit! And the kids had stepped up on Monday and had the first floor in good shape so instead of dedicating my time to my public areas, I got to attack my personal, private HEAP!
Do I want it to get this bad? No! Do I usually let it? No. Does it get so overwhelming that I don't know where to start? Oh yeah!
So I started at the doorway and worked across the room. I sorted, I removed from the room. There was very little trash...it was all stuff that hasn't been put away (like laundry tossed on the cedar chest) and Christmas gifts and such. So I worked, and I worked and I worked. And then I had to leave! It wasn't done! I knew it would be hard to come back and I didn't want to leave it half done...but I had to!
Before I got to the room again, a friend posted on her facebook about rearranging furniture. She asked if we tend to periodically rearrange or leave everything as is. I am a rearranger. I LOVE to rearrange when the kids and Cory are not home and then watch their faces when they walk in! Too funny! So of course, I decided to finish the room last night and rearrange while I was at it!
I also still need to tackle my bookshelf. If you can see, it is all at least 2 books deep and much of it is 3 layers deep. And this is just ONE bookshelf in the house! There is another in the hallway, one in Rebekah's room, at least two in the basement and still books in boxes! This picture also shows the wire basket unit that holds my jeans and shorts. Since I have family who sent me lots of pretty things from Kenya, I used some of them to drape over the sides of the baskets to pretty them up a bit!
As you can see, the mantle still needs some work...and I realized yesterday that only 2 of our 4 children have their picture up! Oops! Guess I need to add a few frames! The wood rack is empty since he made a fire last night and the one downstairs is full so I think I will take some up and get it ready for another fire! That was nice! Falling asleep to the crackling fire! My curio cabinet of music boxes got moved, but not dusted and cleaned out well. I admit it. It is not a perfect job! But I think the amazing thing is that I did it! I cleaned up the room, I moved the curio cabinet, the bed and the cedar chest and the end result was that Cory wanted to know WHY and I was able to say "Because I love you".
And you know the side benefit? Some giggles! See, moving the bed all around messed with him! He gets up earlier than me in the morning and he is so wonderful he makes his way to the bathroom in the dark. He has done it from one spot in the room for a year or two now. So this morning he floundered. He fumbled! He almost fell! It appears he does better maneuvering through a maze of stuff than across open floor space! Oops! Sorry dear! But you will get used to it because I realized! My master bedroom IS my sanctuary! And it is evidence of my love for my husband and he is NOT going to come last on the list anymore!Thank you for sharing this walk through my honestly horrible room! Next on my list will be the bathroom and the closet....but I admit...not today! We are painting the living room, staircase and part of the kitchen this weekend and I am resting up to tackle that!
Monday, February 18, 2013
Amazing Day!
I just had to post about this! Today was a day off school. Usually I dread those! I knew I was having friends over this afternoon to plan the garden. I knew I wanted the house cleaned up but was sure I was going to have to FIGHT to get it done. I hate that. I dread that! I wanted to avoid today.
James got up early and whiny. Oh great! This is not a great start! The girls didn't get up. We had to get them up. It was later than normal so I was pretty convinced that I was going to end up with grumps! They came down and quietly got breakfast. I wondered then why they were so quiet!
Well, the next thing I knew, they were ALL working on their chores WITHOUT me saying anything! They worked and worked and worked together. The house got cleaner and I got happier and they kept at it! They came to me and asked me to inspect rooms they thought were good enough. They didn't complain when I pointed out areas I thought they had missed! They didn't complain when I asked them to do something, they just stopped what they were doing, did what I asked and then went back to the previous job. This in itself is pretty shocking!
BUT that isn't all! Seriously! It got BETTER!
They asked if they could call Mamaw and have her come and play games. They called and she was going to be an hour or so. They got out the Wii and played together. Usually it only takes about 10 minutes for it to digress into bickering, fighting, insisting that someone is out to get the other, etc. Today, it was quiet. They started laughing. They were nice. They had fun. They stopped and got lunch and cleaned up the Wii without complaint! I was well on my way to my heart attack when my friends came over.
As my friends and I planned our garden (we are sharing this year), my kids played games with my mom. Lots of games. For a couple of hours. With no raised voices, lots of laughter and no fighting! I was SO glad! I was pretty sure it was too good to be true! They continued all day (and at 7 pm they are still calm and happy and I am still in shock!)
Well, I have to admit it! As shocked and pleased as I was, I decided to treat them! We went to Dairy Queen. That doesn't happen often! I thought I would share this short video of my James as he tried to eat his ice cream. He is so particular about getting "yucky" that he didn't really want to hold it! It was really pretty funny! He eventually decided that the ice cream was not worth it and gave the whole thing to his sister!
James got up early and whiny. Oh great! This is not a great start! The girls didn't get up. We had to get them up. It was later than normal so I was pretty convinced that I was going to end up with grumps! They came down and quietly got breakfast. I wondered then why they were so quiet!
Well, the next thing I knew, they were ALL working on their chores WITHOUT me saying anything! They worked and worked and worked together. The house got cleaner and I got happier and they kept at it! They came to me and asked me to inspect rooms they thought were good enough. They didn't complain when I pointed out areas I thought they had missed! They didn't complain when I asked them to do something, they just stopped what they were doing, did what I asked and then went back to the previous job. This in itself is pretty shocking!
BUT that isn't all! Seriously! It got BETTER!
They asked if they could call Mamaw and have her come and play games. They called and she was going to be an hour or so. They got out the Wii and played together. Usually it only takes about 10 minutes for it to digress into bickering, fighting, insisting that someone is out to get the other, etc. Today, it was quiet. They started laughing. They were nice. They had fun. They stopped and got lunch and cleaned up the Wii without complaint! I was well on my way to my heart attack when my friends came over.
As my friends and I planned our garden (we are sharing this year), my kids played games with my mom. Lots of games. For a couple of hours. With no raised voices, lots of laughter and no fighting! I was SO glad! I was pretty sure it was too good to be true! They continued all day (and at 7 pm they are still calm and happy and I am still in shock!)
Well, I have to admit it! As shocked and pleased as I was, I decided to treat them! We went to Dairy Queen. That doesn't happen often! I thought I would share this short video of my James as he tried to eat his ice cream. He is so particular about getting "yucky" that he didn't really want to hold it! It was really pretty funny! He eventually decided that the ice cream was not worth it and gave the whole thing to his sister!
Saturday, February 16, 2013
Weekend, Full House, Project Prep
The weekend has arrived. Around here that means a full house. And it doesn't just mean that we have all of our family home, often we have multiple extras here! This weekend is kinda calm and quiet! Bethany has a sinus infection and is still a bit under the weather. Rebekah is pretty tired and has to babysit later this evening. Jessica and James will play all day! Laura will chat with her parents and possibly some friends. I can't imagine sending my child around the world and just using Skype to talk to them once a week! WOW!
Cory is going over to his cousin's house and helping cut wood all day. And I get to tackle the house! Yep, the entire house! It seems like we had a crazy week and things got behind, again! So today I start in the kitchen, and I move through the living room, foyer and dining room. Somewhere in there I want to get some laundry done....and clean up the laundry room....and then there are bathrooms. Oh my. I haven't even mentioned bedrooms yet!
See, I have a goal! I know it sounds crazy but a month or more ago we bought paint for the living room and kitchen and stairway up. Yep, there it sits. Forgotten in front of the fireplace, hidden behind some toys, blocked by the wood rack, used as a stepstool for my son to try to reach the phones on the mantle. Kinda expensive step stool.
I was the one who instigated the paint change in the rooms...and I think it will be great! We decided to go with some coordinating colors....and I chose one that was light and pretty and I thought would be a change but not too drastic. I am not afraid of color, but just wanted to be light and open! The picture doesn't show well, but we have a fairly bright blue/teal mix now and the light swatch in the middle is more of a light green color. Still nice and bright and having more color than white or cream, but not the blue that seems to show dirt and dings quite badly!
I let my hubby pick the accent color. I thought it would be nice to change it up since right now the entire living room, all the way up the stairs and all of the hallways upstairs are the same color. We talked about making the staircase a different color and make the wall with the fireplace in the living room be the matching color as an accent to tie the two areas together. I thought since I picked a light color that Cory would to and we worked and worked and worked....and this is what he chose!
Yes, that is a red color. Now the picture does not do it justice...it is called some kind of bean. It kinda reminds me of the color of those Boston Baked Bean candies we used to get Mom when we were kids! Anyone else remember those? Anyway, it almost exactly matches the flowers in the border in my kitchen.
My kitchen is a room I LOVE! I have posted pictures of it on my blog before. I decided when we were building the house that I wanted the backsplash between my counter and my cupboards to be pretty....and I knew I wanted flowers and yellow, bright, cheery and welcoming! This is the border we found, but it was tall! Taller than "normal". We put up the border before the cupboards and counters went in. My mom and I talked and talked and finally decided that the border wouldn't last if we didn't protect it so we covered it with a satin polyurethane that would make it washable. Then we chose a paint color for the room based on the border since most areas it goes under the counter and/or cupboard but at the stove, it ends about 4 inches below the hood. Well, after 9 years that yellow above the cupboards and especially around the doorways is looking pretty dingy and banged up and shows fingerprints terribly! So, since the color matches, Cory decided we should put the red color above the cupboards and around the door frames so that it blends the living room and dining room and hallway and staircase all together. Since we have an open floor plan, that should work well, I hope!
So my goal for this weekend is to get the house cleaned up enough that I can tell the kids that next weekend, no matter what, we are painting! It will be clean enough to shove everything to the middle of the room and paint around the edges. It will be enough warning that they can plan ahead and NOT try to go to a friend's house or whatever. In my dreams, this is going to work well! In reality....well, I will post updates!
Anyone else have a huge project like this that you need to tackle? Are you like me and have put it off for a couple of weeks, or months....or more like me and have known it needed done for a couple of years?
How often do you paint the rooms in your house? Do you have any rooms (like my dining room) that you absolutely love and you are trying to wait as long as possible to paint it because you can't imagine changing it to anything else?
What weekend project can you start today?
Cory is going over to his cousin's house and helping cut wood all day. And I get to tackle the house! Yep, the entire house! It seems like we had a crazy week and things got behind, again! So today I start in the kitchen, and I move through the living room, foyer and dining room. Somewhere in there I want to get some laundry done....and clean up the laundry room....and then there are bathrooms. Oh my. I haven't even mentioned bedrooms yet!
See, I have a goal! I know it sounds crazy but a month or more ago we bought paint for the living room and kitchen and stairway up. Yep, there it sits. Forgotten in front of the fireplace, hidden behind some toys, blocked by the wood rack, used as a stepstool for my son to try to reach the phones on the mantle. Kinda expensive step stool.
I let my hubby pick the accent color. I thought it would be nice to change it up since right now the entire living room, all the way up the stairs and all of the hallways upstairs are the same color. We talked about making the staircase a different color and make the wall with the fireplace in the living room be the matching color as an accent to tie the two areas together. I thought since I picked a light color that Cory would to and we worked and worked and worked....and this is what he chose!
My kitchen is a room I LOVE! I have posted pictures of it on my blog before. I decided when we were building the house that I wanted the backsplash between my counter and my cupboards to be pretty....and I knew I wanted flowers and yellow, bright, cheery and welcoming! This is the border we found, but it was tall! Taller than "normal". We put up the border before the cupboards and counters went in. My mom and I talked and talked and finally decided that the border wouldn't last if we didn't protect it so we covered it with a satin polyurethane that would make it washable. Then we chose a paint color for the room based on the border since most areas it goes under the counter and/or cupboard but at the stove, it ends about 4 inches below the hood. Well, after 9 years that yellow above the cupboards and especially around the doorways is looking pretty dingy and banged up and shows fingerprints terribly! So, since the color matches, Cory decided we should put the red color above the cupboards and around the door frames so that it blends the living room and dining room and hallway and staircase all together. Since we have an open floor plan, that should work well, I hope!
So my goal for this weekend is to get the house cleaned up enough that I can tell the kids that next weekend, no matter what, we are painting! It will be clean enough to shove everything to the middle of the room and paint around the edges. It will be enough warning that they can plan ahead and NOT try to go to a friend's house or whatever. In my dreams, this is going to work well! In reality....well, I will post updates!
Anyone else have a huge project like this that you need to tackle? Are you like me and have put it off for a couple of weeks, or months....or more like me and have known it needed done for a couple of years?
How often do you paint the rooms in your house? Do you have any rooms (like my dining room) that you absolutely love and you are trying to wait as long as possible to paint it because you can't imagine changing it to anything else?
What weekend project can you start today?
Friday, February 15, 2013
Productive Week Here
This is one of those weeks where I actually feel VERY productive! Amazing!
I spent quite a bit of time working on business things. I am trying to get my business off the ground and doing so takes TIME! I have invested time in website pictures like the one above this week, product making this week, research and development including new scents AND new products like my new sugar scrub pictured here and working on new scent blends too. Created a Citrus Burst, one lemony one for my daughter that smelled like Lemon Head Candy and a Chai Spice on that my best friend should love!
In addition to that, I have dealt with a little boy who decided that if he was potty trained during the day he should wear undies to bed...GREAT right? Well, 4 dry nights have also ended up with 4 HORRIBLY wet days! Like 5-6 times a day after a month of only maybe once a day at most! I so do not understand the workings of a 3 year old mind!
I have been trying to garden plan a little bit and have a friend coming on Monday to plan what seeds we will be using in our shared garden this year. Planning ahead on garden projects too, like asking my hubby to create a tomato cage/stake combo and discovering I should think about using that for peas too!
Then I have had my "normal" things like laundry and dishes and cooking (I did resort to freezer meals a few times, glad I made them a month ago!) and cleaning and being a taxi (for my children and the Amish), and parent/teacher conferences, and a broken down (then repaired thanks to my hubby) van, and the list goes on!
How in the world do people run a house and work outside of it also!?
So as I sit here with a new recipe in the oven, wondering if my kids will like it, I think I need to work on labeling all of the products I made, and I should think about preparing dinner...but instead I am typing!
Wanna know my recipe? I twisted a recipe from this site.
I didn't have quite all the ingredients so I just started tossing in things I thought would work! :-) Yeah, that is totally how I roll! So, my revised recipe?
1 1/2 cups old fashioned oats
1/2 cup grated coconut
A healthy handful of peanuts (roasted and salted because that is what I had, but I eliminated the salt later then!)
I was gonna use raisins, but found a partial bag of chocolate chips and decided to treat the kids!
Mix these separate and pour over:
A healthy bit of vanilla (I never measure!)
A couple good spoonfuls of JIF Chocolate flavored Hazelnut Spread
A bit more than 1/2 cup of honey...it just seemed a bit stiff yet so I added a bit more.
I mixed everything together and put in a 9X13 pan lined with parchment paper and pressed flat. I then put them in the oven at 325 for 20 minutes because my kids would rather have chewy than crispy crunchy granola bars! And now I wait! Only 5 minutes left! Oh! Hey! Guess what! I (who don't like chocolate!) do not have to be the guinea pig! See, my 12 year old is home sick today!
Doesn't she look like a good guinea pig all curled up with our Daisy with her? I think she looks hungry! She needs a snack!
So as I close and take the granola out to cool, I am moving on to the 3 year old not napping, the packaging that needs done and contemplating labeling changes on the product I made yesterday. I'm just not happy with trying to fit all the info on one label.
In addition to that, I have dealt with a little boy who decided that if he was potty trained during the day he should wear undies to bed...GREAT right? Well, 4 dry nights have also ended up with 4 HORRIBLY wet days! Like 5-6 times a day after a month of only maybe once a day at most! I so do not understand the workings of a 3 year old mind!
I have been trying to garden plan a little bit and have a friend coming on Monday to plan what seeds we will be using in our shared garden this year. Planning ahead on garden projects too, like asking my hubby to create a tomato cage/stake combo and discovering I should think about using that for peas too!
Then I have had my "normal" things like laundry and dishes and cooking (I did resort to freezer meals a few times, glad I made them a month ago!) and cleaning and being a taxi (for my children and the Amish), and parent/teacher conferences, and a broken down (then repaired thanks to my hubby) van, and the list goes on!
How in the world do people run a house and work outside of it also!?
So as I sit here with a new recipe in the oven, wondering if my kids will like it, I think I need to work on labeling all of the products I made, and I should think about preparing dinner...but instead I am typing!
Wanna know my recipe? I twisted a recipe from this site.
I didn't have quite all the ingredients so I just started tossing in things I thought would work! :-) Yeah, that is totally how I roll! So, my revised recipe?
1 1/2 cups old fashioned oats
1/2 cup grated coconut
A healthy handful of peanuts (roasted and salted because that is what I had, but I eliminated the salt later then!)
I was gonna use raisins, but found a partial bag of chocolate chips and decided to treat the kids!
Mix these separate and pour over:
A healthy bit of vanilla (I never measure!)
A couple good spoonfuls of JIF Chocolate flavored Hazelnut Spread
A bit more than 1/2 cup of honey...it just seemed a bit stiff yet so I added a bit more.
I mixed everything together and put in a 9X13 pan lined with parchment paper and pressed flat. I then put them in the oven at 325 for 20 minutes because my kids would rather have chewy than crispy crunchy granola bars! And now I wait! Only 5 minutes left! Oh! Hey! Guess what! I (who don't like chocolate!) do not have to be the guinea pig! See, my 12 year old is home sick today!
Doesn't she look like a good guinea pig all curled up with our Daisy with her? I think she looks hungry! She needs a snack!
So as I close and take the granola out to cool, I am moving on to the 3 year old not napping, the packaging that needs done and contemplating labeling changes on the product I made yesterday. I'm just not happy with trying to fit all the info on one label.
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